Guest post by Yogasteya blogger April Eckwielen
I have a problem. Some may not think it is a very big deal, but I do. My problem is that I do not have a regular meditation practice. Actually, I don’t have a meditation practice at all. I feel like I need to go to some support group for non-meditators and proclaim my non-meditating ways.
“Hello. My name is April and I am a yoga teacher who cannot meditate”.
As silly as that sounds, it’s a pretty big deal for me and something that I feel I need to work on. I’ve asked myself time and time again why I have such a hard time having a regular meditation practice and my only answer is I can’t get into or out of my own head.
I have an extremely active mind. I constantly have ideas, worries, to-do lists, schedules and the occasional show tune always running through my head. I can never fully check out in order to check in. Does that make sense? Believe me, I have tried. I have all the “things” one would need for an awesome meditation practice but I never seem to be able to follow through. Candles could be lit, soft music could be playing, and I could be sitting comfortably in Ardha Padmasana (Half Lotus Pose) on top of my meditation cushion but nothing happens. It’s almost like I am reenacting the scene from Eat, Pray, Love where Julia Roberts character is introduced to the meditation cave at the ashram and can’t even last a minute because she is mentally planning her décor for her own meditation room. I can so relate to this.
I’ve been told that in order to get into my head, I must first get out of it. When I first heard this I was completely confused. If I need to get into my head, why would I leave it in the first place? I then realized that in order to create any kind of mindful meditation practice, I needed to get out of the part of my head that had the running to-do list and planning my private Zen oasis and get into the part of my head where I can focus on my breath in order for my mind to open and guide me through whatever that particular meditation’s purpose is.
It is a constant battle. An almost good vs. evil saga that I have to navigate through any time I want to attempt meditation. Like any struggle, I have my good days where I can actually be mindful of my practice, even for just a few minutes (baby steps here) and I have my bad days where I just sit there and wonder if I should get yellow polish at my next pedicure. Now you can see my need for that non-meditator support group.
Getting out of my head in order to get into it is something that I will continue to work on so I can create a better meditation practice. I know that I am not any less of a yogi because of my non-existent meditation practice. My credentials do not automatically disappear because I cannot get my act together. I can only continue to try and create some form of mindful meditation practice and not worry that I struggle at times. The most important thing I need to remember is that whatever I do, it is my journey and it will evolve in its own way.
“Hello. My name is April and my meditation practice is a work is a work in progress”.
April is a unique gal whose passions include yoga, writing, energy work and the occasional pin up convention. On this fantastic life journey, she has her husband and two children cheering her on. She is a 200 hr. certified yoga teacher, certified prenatal yoga teacher and Curvy Yoga certified. She focuses on balancing the chakras through yoga and meditation. Her passion is educating her community that yoga is for everyone regardless of body type or ability. She has recently opened her own mobile yoga business, Red Lotus Yoga in Winter Garden, FL. Find her on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and on her website at www.redlotusyogafl.com.